Thursday, September 27, 2012

Loss came and became a habit

I was once again left with the pen in my hand, looking at a blank piece of paper. I had nothing to say, nothing to write, as if my inside just emptied and the words couldn't fit in my void. I don't know if it was the words that seemed poor or the void that was refusing to get filled.

Loss came and became a habit...

Loss..What did I have to lose and what did I lose that I didn't have? It seems like the desert and the tear that drops burns the cheeks, the eyes stink, but I keep staring at the emptiness waiting for nothing.

It's not guilt, it's fear. The fear that makes the mind get stuck and the soul to empty. The fear that defeated romance, love, came to the heart and made her bleed. Like a modern fairytale that doesn't always have a happy and envious ending. An ending that symbolizes the beginning of the isolation, and what stays is the loss...

I don't want to see the ending that I caused...

I want to stay here, looking at the blank piece of paper...

xoxo
B.

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Saturday, September 01, 2012

It's payback...


She's almost ready. A last brush on her hair and off she goes. She looks at her watch. Where is he? He's late. The phone ringing interrupts her thoughts. She picks up.

- Hey baby.
- Hey. Where are you? I'm ready and waiting.
- You know...I won't be able to make it. I had a sudden business meeting, a client I should definitely meet.
 
She frowns, but doesn't show.
- Ok! That's fine. We'll talk tomorrow.

Fine, it's ok. Sh*t happen. But she's determined not to let this ruin her mood. She'll go out anyway.

She goes to the usual bar, with that rock music she loves. She enters, greets some friends and then suddenly...she sees him. He's sitting at the bar with a blonde little bimbo giglling, hanging on him while he leaves a kiss on her lips.

Their eyes cross and he seems to freeze. He loses it, but she just sends a casual nod. Turns her back and keeps talking with her friends. In seconds she sees him grab Barbie and rush out.

Next day the phone just keeps ringing. She finally answers after a couple of days with a lazy "Yeeeees..."

- Hey baby! Where have you been lost all these days?
- Who is this?
- What do you mean who is this???!!! How many people call you "baby"?
- Aaaaaah...Hey, what's up?
- What do you mean what's up? I asked you a question and you didn't answer!
- I, on the other hand, don't remember asking you anything, although I should.

 ................................................

 Silence... Awkardness...

- Are you talking about the other night? My business meeting got cancelled babe and I went out with a childhood friend.
- ΟΚ.
- What does Ok mean? Don't you believe me?
- Of course...of course i believe you. Besides, that's why I didn't even ask you.
- Are we going out?
- Certainly.

She devoted three hours to get ready. When she finally finished, the outcome was at least provocative. Black dress with a mao neck, and on the back a V opening starting from the shoulders until right below the waist, carefully hidden by the long wavy hair. High heels make her 1.75+.

He sees her and remains in shock. She looks at him and laughs inside, doing everything possible to challenge him.

And the night flows magically....

- Baby, it's 2 am. Shall we go?
- Yes, but where?
- Do you want to go to my place?

She smiles and gives him a kiss.

Arriving home, she takes off her shoes and starts unzipping her dress going towards the bathroom. She returns with a towel wrapped around her body and water drops shining on her skin.
She sits on him, grabs his hands and "locks" them behind his head.

- Today..is my game.

She starts exploring him from the tips of his fingers down to his face, his chest, his belly, between his legs... Wherever her fingers pass, her tongue follows. His breath becomes heavy, irregular. She plays with him and right before the end, stops. She brings him in new levels of pleasure, making him feel like he had never before. She watches him losing control, hears him moan, talk incoherently, fully surrender. She pushes him inside her and starts moving gently. She picks up the rhythm and stops, only to start all the way from the beginning. She keeps holding his hands over his head. Her hair fall on his chest and his face, but he doesn't understand anything. He lives with every pore of his existence the ultimate pleasure.

She starts moving faster and suddenly she remains completely still. He opens his eyes wondering, ready to ask: "why?" but doesn't have the time. She tightens her muscles, locking him again and again and again. The wondering trasforms into a long "aaaaaahhh!!!!" as he finishes.

She lets him calm and gets up. Takes the towel and moves towards the bathroom.

- Where are you going?
- I'll have a shower and be back.

She lets the water running and gets dressed. Opens the door slowly and returns in the room. He listens to the water and is surprised seeing her dressed in front of him. He looks at her dreamily approaching him. If the dictionary had a picture under the word surprrise, it would definitely be his.

She raises the ashtray and leaves a euro-bill underneath.
- I should normally ask for change, because your "services" aren't worth that much. But tonight, I'm in a good mood, so never mind. Keep it.

She turns her back, opens the door and slowly closes it behind her.

Tonight’s the night I shed my wicked soul...

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